~I Remember~

I remember just one hour ago seeing your face.
I remember your anger.

I remember your hatred.
I remember you said that I was not worthy of forgiveness.
I remember my last words to you; powerful words yet not intended to be powerful.
I remember arriving at the accident; fear overwhelmed me.

I remember being told to step back. I approached you anyway.
I remember seeing you carried to the ambulance. Your entire face, deep red.
I remember your expression when you saw me, no words could explain it.
I remember arriving at the hospital; the doctor coming inside the waiting room.

I remember the doctor’s cold, dry, blank expression.
I remember at that moment I knew. I could feel tears running down my face.
I remembered my last words to you.
I remembered your anger, your hatred.

I remember thinking that I couldn’t live with this regret.
I remember thinking that I couldn’t live without you.
I remember walking to the top of the hospital. A wave of images of you, washed through my mind.
I remember the cool night air.

I remember standing there, at the edge.
I remember my final breath; a sharp breeze came upon me.
And here I lay, on the cold, damp cement, drowning in my own blood.
And somehow, I feel I deserved it.                

by. B.R.